It’s exhausting to hear about how many people think camming or sex work is not an actual job.
It’s even more frustrating that our biggest critics are viewers without tokens who DO not and WILL not contribute to the community except to drag it in the mud and talk shit about things they simply cannot afford and just don’t understand.
You see, turning ON your webcam means turning OFF everything about yourself. And while some will interject and disagree and even say part of the reason they have done so well is because of how real they actually are..I am going to call bullshit and let the chips fall where they may.
Here are my examples:
If you are having family problems, you can’t just blurt out that your mom is facing eviction or your husband was just laid off because there will always be people who are only focused on tits and bits and who can’t maintain a hard-on if all you’re going to talk about is how fucked your life is.
Yes, some of your ACTUAL personality will eek out..it’s inevitable.
However, If you are fighting with your spouse, you have to dry those tears good and hard and pretend you’re not bothered by the bullshit that is your personal life, and instead deal with other people’s personal shit storms instead.
And, If everyday is a struggle financially, you can’t talk about how you hate eating Ramen or how you’re about to have your light bill cut off, because no one wants to hear that you have problems. They have a boner they can’t see past, and you have to make it go away by sharing as little ABOUT yourself yet as much OF yourself, as possible.
We aren’t just web cam models or sex workers, it’s like we are woodworkers and architects as well because you need to craft and create a crate inside your brain that will be big enough to store the parts of your personality that others may deem unsexy.
This BULLSHIT BOX, is where you will have store your feelings, thoughts, emotions and all your self doubts until after you say goodbye to your viewers and disconnect from the internet. Not because you can’t be yourself on cam. As a matter of fact, most guys like when you’re relatable and honest and seemingly down to earth. However, You have to do this because you need to treat every cam performance like it’s a full day on set with a film crew, producer and director yelling cut because it ISN’T real life. It IS a show. And just because there are viewers out there screaming for the realness, we also have to think about our protection and our self preservation so that instead of us just stripping ourselves raw and open and vulnerable we are also able to keep little pieces of ourselves FOR ourselves.
So, before you bring the hammer down on a cam girl for not appearing like she’s hard working and for not fulfilling ALL your needs as they arise, you better make sure your tools are heavier and more bad ass than hers because she’s been building boxes and slinging hammers for years and she’s got a mean upper swing that will smash your expectations to pieces.